Survival Behaviors
| Survival Behavior | Underlying Emotional Issues | Example |
|---|---|---|
| Lying/Stealing | Value Issues | “What I learned in my birth family and through the system about how to behave is very different from how your family behaves.” |
| Hoarding food | Control, fear of dependency | “I don’t know when I’ll eat again. There was never any food in my house.” |
| Isolation, distancing | Fear of trust/attachment | “I don’t want to get close to other people. They’ll just hurt me.” |
| Defiance, testing | Need of control | “I feel that my life is out of control.” |
| Hitting, aggressiveness | Anger, communication | “I’ll hurt you before you hurt me.” |
| Bossy, stubborn, Over-competency | Overcompensation | “I am not a child! I have been taking care of myself and my brothers and sisters for years. Don’t trust you can to take care of me.” |
| Inappropriate sexual behavior | Seeking love, attention | “This is the only way that I know to get close.” |
| Identity issues | Poor sense of self-esteem | “Because of my abuse/neglect, many moves, or believing I was given away, I feel like nobody.” |
| Anger/Depression | Underlying tension that can’t be identified or described in words. | “I’m afraid to get close to you. You may hurt me too.” |
| Separation/Anxiety | Emotional or developmental delays. | “You will leave me just like everyone else has.” |